Perfection: What the hell

I’m all for boosting body types and finally making curvy ladies and gents feel sexy, beautiful and confident in all walks of life including in the spotlight again. As we know and read every single day the general ‘perfection’ look is an hourglass figure, the skinny girls and muscular men plastered from magazine pages to in front of the cameras make the rest of us feel ashamed of what we have staring back at us in the mirror. We are so deeply affected by these images that we cover up and hide from the flash of a family photo as much as possible. This is something that is even affecting many children’s mental health because they see these photoshopped images and think this is the only way they should/ need to look to become successful, liked or even happy. We see a size 12 as ‘fat’ in this society and pray on those above the model like size 6/8 as ugly, horrible and miserable. Something we are innocently taught through the social world. As a society, we show becoming thinner as a happy achievement and on every bus poster or billboard I’ve seen to change yourself the before the image is sad, grey and unflattering whereas the after is happy, bright and totally different people in my eyes. Marketers make sure to put clothes that fit the body type perfectly for the after to show what a difference a product apparently makes.

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However over the last few months, I’ve seen a few posts flying around the social marvel I’m so addicted too, expressing and boosting the curvy body types  for example how we see Jessy Nelson from Little Mix as the ‘fat’ one which for starters she looks amazing and the word fat shouldn’t in any way or form be connected to this women. But while looking at this story and mentally praising the body confident women commenting on this story about their own stories. I saw comments that angered me and generally made me think twice about my own body type things like men don’t want sticks and bones, so f*ck off all size 6, 8 & 10s. Or they’re only women if their plus size of 10. This annoys me for two reasons, one because you can’t boost one body type up by pulling down another, to me this makes no sense, I can’t get my head around the fact we are hating on a society idea ( we made it) but creating a whole other one in the process of boosting confidence in many people. Another reason is because beauty is defined by the beholder so no-one can say that men/women don’t want a certain thing because we see everyone differently, also no one should be creating their self for another person.

I’ve been ‘skinny’ all my life, I’ve had people tell me they wish they had my figure and oh please swap with me. I’ve had people tell me to eat burgers because I’m fading away or calling my anorexic like it’s some kind of joke.  I hate it and not only because my sticky out hip bone likes to attach itself to door handles, cupboards and even my bed giving me the feeling I’ve just been shot. But because I have no figure at all, my wrist can’t hold bracelets, my jeans are baggy but seem to be too short and I look minus my age by years. Even though I say all these things and so desperately wish that all the food I devour could sometimes stick to me, if I was at the other end of body type fantasy I’d be envious of myself now, I’d be hoping for hip bones and baggy jeans. Believe it or not, we are constantly striving for perfection and will hardly ever reach it in our lives no matter what we look like,w hat we do it’ll never be good enough for fashion gurus, society or the person who stares back at us with hating eyes every single day. As humans we strive for perfection but as the time ticks so do our idea of what perfection really is, no matter what we become we will hardly ever reach a place where we don’t have anything bad to say about ourselves.

No matter what these people are telling me, I’m not creating my perfect self for another person to rip into a thousand pieces or change their mind on their idea of perfection. I’m  tired of living in a place where we are constantly judging the ideal body type, face or even personality, I’m tired of hating on skinny people and curvy people. I’m tired of fighting for a perfection I know I can’t reach. There’s a small sprinkle of hope in the back of my mind that eventually we will change all these ideas and love ourselves for ourselves. We’ll teach kids to be who they want to be and not to chase a society we have created.

 

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